Studying and teaching about happiness is, as I understand it, a relatively new field of positive psychology. The new definition of “healthy” is not a neutral state marked by the absence of mental or physical illness (surviving), but a positive state of productivity and satisfaction (thriving).
There is a web community called Big Think that brings thought leaders across disciplines together to share big ideas. This week, they featured a video conversation from Tal Ben-Shahar, a Harvard University lecturer on happiness on the topic of “Five Ways to Become Happier Today.”
According to Ben-Shahar, one of the key emotions correlating to happiness is gratitude. We often forget to be grateful until we experience loss or the possibility of loss–we’re grateful for our health after we’ve been sick, or we’re grateful for our jobs when we see others losing them. But cultivating our gratitude everyday helps us focus on everyday moments of happiness.
So How Do I Do It?
His big recommendation is to start keeping a gratitude journal. Each night before you go to bed, take a minute to write down five things you are grateful for, big or small. With my kids (who are 3 and 5), my approach is to ask them each night when I tuck them in to tell me three good things that happened to them today, or three things they are thankful for. When the answers tend toward “dessert,” I try to gently ask them about playing with their cousins after school or doing a puzzle with Daddy before dinner. They quickly catch on.
Gratitude Leads to Generosity
Ben-Shahar doesn’t go into what happens when you are more grateful and happier, but in my experience, gratitude leads you to realize just how much you already have, and that in turn make you realize just how much you have to give. Grateful people are generous people. Grateful people are philanthropic. If you want your children to grow up to be charitable, teach them empathy and gratitude by modeling empathy and gratitude.
Learn More
To learn about the other 4 things Ben-Shahar recommends in order to be happier, watch the full video by clicking here.
Tags: gratitude, happiness, positive psychology, raising charitable children, Tal Ben-Shahar
October 9, 2009 at 8:44 am |
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